grieving and loss

We did an emotional health inventory during the FCC women's retreat and I guess it wasn't a surprise when the results showed that I am still an adolescent when it comes to the area of grieving and loss.

According to one of my friends, I had gained a reputation (I don't know how wide the circumference of people is) of being someone who is able to let go quickly after a break up. I never saw that as a
"problem" until a revelation during the retreat.

Previously, I think it's a good thing to be able to move on quickly after a break up. I feel sad but maybe only for a short season. It's the same even with my Dad in hospital for the second time in a year for about 6 weeks now. My way of coping is to occupy my life and my thoughts with many happy things and activities so I won't mourn and whine and be melancholic and waste my life away, right? Apparently wrong.

1) my ex-partners had the impression that the relationship meant very little to me since I was able to move on so quickly.

2) I don't know if there's any baggage in me that's yet to be released that will be carried to the next relationship

3) When I don't mourn fully (I do mourn and cry, but not for very long), I am not able to fully and truly emphatise with people who go through similar situations and hence, will not be able to comfort them or help them along in that journey of healing as effectively as I would.

Maybe I am meant to let myself cry and mourn a little more, so points 1-3 will be turned into good. I hope there's no next time though. But I guess I will try letting myself grieve a bit more if there is *fingers crossed*.
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